This is 25...

Wow! It has been so long since I’ve wrote to you guys. To say the least life got the best of me. There have been so many changes that have occurred over the past year and a half that didn’t leave me in the best place mentally, and I needed a break to just process and figure everything out. Life just has a way of hitting you when you least expect it but we all need that wake up call every once in a while. As much as we dread it, it will come. I always thought that going through life with no struggles and issues would be a dream, I mean who doesn’t want that? But I've come to realize how struggles allow you to be grateful, push harder, realize your potential, and break free of the thoughts that have always held you back.I turned 25 a week ago, and leading up to my birthday I really thought about what I wanted out of life and what I wanted for my life. Over the years I have let my situations, what people thought about me and most importantly the negative things I thought about myself limit me. I believed that being me wasn’t good enough and even being me was too much. I told myself I couldn’t achieve certain goals because of that. People could tell me about my potential all day long but that small voice in my head always wondered what they saw that I couldn’t see. I could go on and on but I knew it was time for me to get out of my head because life would simply just pass me by.So here I am at 25 and finally letting go of all those limiting beliefs. I made the decision to be me no matter what people think. I will take those risks, believe in my potential and most importantly speak up for myself because I know my worth. I will be as open, honest, and transparent as I can be because life is too short to play pretend. I always feel like myself when I am around people who are open, honest, and transparent and I realized that if I look for that quality in people then I should be a representation of exactly what I want. We live in a world where finding “REAL” people is so hard because everyone feels the need to hide who they really are. We all want to be better than the next person and will dig a hole so deep to bury who we really are that we forget to brush off the dirt when the time comes to just be ourselves.I will admit to being a victim of this, especially when it comes to the workplace. In every single job I have held since college, I have been the only person of color whether it has been in the whole company or on my team. I have been looked at differently, experienced racial comments made in front of me and simply treated differently because I didn’t look or act like everyone else. That caused me to often try and hide who I really was to fit in because I wanted to get treated like everyone else. No matter how I felt, I sucked it up because I felt that is what I needed to do in order to reach the next step on the ladder and get to where I wanted to be. The lack of diversity in the work place is so real ya'll - but that's a whole different discussion.Looking back, I wish I stood up for myself more instead of feeling defeated, but I also know that it’s not too late to be that person. I’m honestly grateful for all of my experiences because it has helped to shape the person I am now, and the person I want to be in the future. Sometimes I wish I could have realized certain things earlier in life but then I remind myself it’s better late than never and everything in life that we go through and experience happens for a reason.Twenty five is going to be a good year for me no matter what challenges come my way. I am a year older and definitely a year wiser. There are so many goals I have set for myself and I will continuously work at them, even when I may doubt myself. Lets face it, we are all human and will have those thoughts but what’s most important is that we take the time we need, figure things out, then brush ourselves off and get back in the game. I am still a "work-in-progress" but simply making the decision to just live in my truth has been a breath of fresh air. There is no person, job or situation that will detour that decision. I will always say "no" to relationships and things that will challenge this decision.Sharing this was a big step but it was part of me holding myself accountable about being honest, open, and transparent. Just as people have done this for me, I want to do the same for others so that people who feel the same know that they are not alone and they too will push past their obstacles. We all have different journeys and whatever you may be feeling or going through now will not be for the rest of your life if you make that decision to simply choose “YOU”.This is 25!